Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Hockey Quiz

Who the hell likes taking tests?! Well according to web advertisers, almost everyone...

If this goes well, we may look to make this a periodic feature. Enjoy! Tell your friends!

Question #1: Who will be the first coach to get fired this season? And how soon?

Or should I re-phrase the question to how soon will Todd Richards get shitcanned? Barry Melrose made it to 16 games, can he beat that record? I don't believe Ron Wilson is going anywhere, at least not if Brian Burke is still in charge. I don't think anyone can expect that much out of Scott Gordon considering what he's been given to work with, even Mr. Wang (no offense). And DeBoer, Carlyle, and Trotz all have the blessings of their respective GM's. But what do you think?

Question #2: What loser gets the odds to pick 1st next year?

My guess is the Islanders with their overtime loss record. The over/under on that is 25.

Question #3: Are the Colorado Avalanche, and most notably Craig Anderson for real? Can they keep it up and make the postseason? If they do, does Joe Sacco win the Jack Adams?

I think they can do it, and if that's the case Sacco's a shoe-in for miracle worker.

Question #4: Will Ovechkin be the first player since Brett Hull in the 1991-92 season to hit the 50 goals in 50 games mark?

When he hits it, expect a new end zone dance.

Question #5: Is this the season that Kings make the playoffs? On the other side, is this the year that Detroit skips the dance?

No, sorry. No. Fuck.

Question #6: What contending but struggling team will seek goaltending help first?

Ken Holland sticks it out. The Bowmans' end up unloading Huet but part of the deal involves a blowjob in a broom closet. (3:38)

Question #7: If the Sharks can't win it all this year, is Patrick Marleau wearing a new jersey next season? If he goes, what's your best guess for his new address?

My take, Sharks make it to the Conference Finals, lose miserably, Doug Wilson blows up the roster, Marleau and Nabokov are gone. Marleau ends up in the Eastern Conference, Montreal if I'm put on the spot, but I didn't look into numbers, and my track record sucks.

Question #8: Who takes home the Calder, and then slumps the following year?

My earlier guesses of Hedman or Gustavsson are looking like shite, but I'll stick to my guns. Del Zotto looks very sharp, I'm impressed, Myers looks good as well, Tavares is about what I would expect on that crap team.

Question #9: Does Waddell get Kovalchuk to re-sign in Atlanta before season's end?

Yes, otherwise the team folds, but it probably goes late.

Question #10: We've already mentioned Kovy and St. Pat, so who's the next name in their contract year that we end up talking about all year?

There's a lot of interesting names out there at the end of their contracts, a lot of goaltenders. Some veterans we'd expect to stay put, if in fact they do return (Lidstrom, Modano), some with potential bad breakups in their future (Frolov, Toskala), and some that without a doubt should be re-signed (Gonchar, Chris Mason). Pekka Rinne is my #1 if Nashville doesn't take care of him sooner, then Jonas Hiller, if Anaheim doesn't take care of him, and then Alex Tanguay. Kidding.

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