Monday, April 26, 2010

Musical Chairs

Photoshop hack job, yeeeah. Do you know how hard it is to find images of players from head to toe in street clothes? Its a bitch. But I think this accurately portrays the current situation of the playoff musical chairs...

Pronger's acting like God on Earth, Crosby looks like his taking a shit with his game face on as "Gentle" Joe playfully hooks him, while Luongo looks on nervously, and those are your seated quarterfinalists. Ovie is moving as quickly as he can around the chairs to make sure he gets a seat, while Zetterberg (or Jared Leto at a movie premier) shows Bryzy the way to play the game while wearing what one can only assume was several rugs from the motherland that were sewn together to make a shirt. Crunchy, as confident as ever, strides to the next available seat, while Trotz attempts to keep Big Z from eating him. On second thought, maybe they're both trying to eat him. Big Daddy Kane makes nice with the bigger boys, while Jesus Price is getting his drink on. Trust me, he's got a drink back there. Probably a smoke in the other.

This really detracts from the real purpose of this post, of which I've now completely forgotten after screwing around with that crap.

They Did It?
The Sharks are passed the first round, and I can hear the sigh of relief from the Bay Area. There was something that happened to that team in that overtime of Game 4. Maybe it was the sight of Douglas Murray actually trying to move up ice, or maybe it was even earlier, like when Dan Boyle dumped it into his own net. Game 5 was the type of game we were expecting all series, all out dominance of the Avs. And they got their collective shit together within the 60 minutes of Game 6 to come back and win it, and get out of a series they thought would be two games shorter. Maybe it was Craig Anderson standing on his head that kept the Avalanche competitive, and running with the Sharks. But they're on to the next round, and you can wait until then to continue pulling your hair out. Grip Pick: Sharks in 5.

Philadelphia upset Jersey to everyone's surprise but in a real "eh" kind of series, maybe its because the Devils flopped in so few games. I looked around, no one picked the Flyers in this series except for the Flyer faithful. Everyone's pick at the beginning of the season to no one's pick at the end of it. Amazing. Just a question, what's worse? Losing in the closing seconds to Carolina last year, or receiving a toolshed beating by #7 seeded cross-state rival this year? Grip Pick: Devils in 5. At least I got the number of games right.

Pittsburgh defeated Ottawa to no one's surprise. At least, after Game 3. Ottawa just always seems to be a middling team, even when they went to the SC Finals, they were sent out on a rail. The Pens look strong, and on a march back to the Finals. Grip Pick: Pens in 6. That's a two-fer.

Vancouver beat out the Kings in what looked like an evenly matched series through the first four games. The Kings gave them a run for their money, but much like the Sharks, the Canuck offense didn't get going until later in the series. The Sedins' are on their usual hum, while Kesler and Burrows will hope to get it going after empty net confidence builders. Grip Pick: Canucks in 6. Bingo bango.

Forgone Conclusions?
Do you really expect Montreal to force a Game 7? I don't, but then again I didn't expect the Caps to have this much trouble putting them down either. Grip Pick: Caps in 5. Come on don't make me look like an idiot like Philadelphia did.

Boston and Buffalo is an ultimate grudge match, and I wish I had been watching more closely to fully enjoy it. I now expect it to go to seven. Grip Pick: Sabres in 6. The Eastern Conference could really make me look stupid.

Nashville, that fucking plucky underdog always seems to give grief to top seeds. They at least won a game on the road in the playoffs this season, so that's something to build off of. I expect the Hawks to end it tonight. Grip Pick: Hawks in 6.

I love the fact that it all comes down to one game for Phoenix and Detroit. Both teams should thrive in this situation making it an epic game. Like I said, I'd love to be wrong in this one, halfway there. Grip Pick: Wings in 6. Go Dogs!

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