Monday, October 4, 2010

2010 Prediction Wrap Up

Okay let’s package the fucker up…

Western Conference FinalsSan Jose Sharks vs. Los Angeles Kings

I don’t know why, but that’s what I got. I think everyone’s given up on the Sharks, and that’s probably exactly what they needed. I think the Kings are going to surprise a lot of people, but just come up short, putting San Jose as the West representative. A more likely situation will have the Kings advancing a round further that last season, and the Sharks bowing out to Vancouver. I just can’t put the Canucks in there, I want them in there so badly, that I think its clouding my judgment, so I’m keeping them out.

Eastern Conference FinalsWashington Capitals vs. Philadelphia Flyers

I like this matchup, but I see Philly taking it, and the eventual prize as well. Frustration ensues for the Red Russians.

Stanley Cup FinalsSan Jose Sharks vs. Philadelphia Flyers

Its anyone’s guess as to who would win this one, but given the Sharks record, and Philadelphia’s bitter defeat last season, its easy to see the Flyers taking it. Now watch they’ll both be out in the first round.

Stanley Cup goes to... Philadelphia with big props to Peter Laviolette, Mike Richards, Chris Pronger, and some goalie who we’ve never heard of before. Claude Giroux to snatch the Conn Smythe with a huge playoffs.

More Awards...

Hart goes to… Joe Thornton. Points race too. Oh shit I blew the surprise.

Art RossJoe Thornton. It is a contract year folks.

Vezina… I think this year it will finally go to Luongo, but some young upstart like Bernier will probably chase him.

Speaking of young upstarts, the Calder will go to… Is Bernier even eligible, I’ll give him my vote.

SelkeMike Richards, I’m starting to get predictable in my picks. Datsyuk will have an injury-filled year, and Kesler will just miss once again.

NorrisDrew Doughty runs away with it. Duncan Keith’ll give ‘em a fight to hold on to it though.

Jack AdamsTerry Murray gets kudos for getting the Kings to where they are towards the end of the season.

Presidents Trophy once again goes to Washington. Easy conference.

That’s it, I’m available for hire to entertain at parties, or any other events where a good laugh is needed. We're cranking it back up again over here, I just can't quit you, you dumb, fucking game. Managed to scrounge up enough change to get Center Ice hooked up again. Best spot to panhandle... Freeway off ramps.

Enjoy the season, you big, dumb animals.

2010 East Predictions

When doing these predictions, its so easy to see these teams in three separate groups; definite playoff teams, bubble team, and shit-out of-luck teams. The East usually gets ragged on for being a much less competitive Conference than the West, and I don’t expect this year to be any different.

I expect Washington to once again take the top spot in the East, rounded out by Pittsburgh in the Atlantic, and Boston in the Northwest. I don’t think Philadelphia’s goaltending roundhouse will be as much of an issue as it appears to be, and the Flyers will probably finish with more points than the B’s.

But the top 8 should look something like this…
1. Washington Capitals
2. Pittsburgh Penguins
3. Boston Bruins
4. Philadelphia Flyers
5. New Jersey Devils
6. Tampa Bay Lightning
7. Montreal Canadiens
8. Buffalo Sabres
Again, not too crazy about the Sabres, but I think Miller will put that team on his back once again and lug them into a first round exit. Montreal is already having a rough go, going with Price instead of Halak, but I expect them to squeak in with the lack of competition. I have Toronto and Atlanta much improved, but on the outside looking in. I just can’t see Ottawa sniffing anywhere near a berth this year with their goaltending woes, and I may be crazy to have them this low but fuck it. What have they done for me lately? I like the Isles to beat out the Rangers just ‘cause its funner, and I think Florida will be way out in front of taking the “shittiest team in the League” title. Carolina just in front of them.

Mistakes? Pittsburgh always seems to be a much better team in the postseason than the regular season, but I expect the opposite to be true for no good reason other than my opinion. Bruins get third by default, despite having two rivals in the top 8 as well. Putting the Devils that low is really defying the typical magic they pull when the season comes to a close, but I do not expect the Kovalchuk experiment to work this year either, as well as MacLean’s honeymoon. Tampa is obviously a long shot but considering the good vibes radiating off of Stevie Y from down in the Bay, you can’t help but toss them into the mix. Not including Ottawa will probably be a mistake, but like I said before, fuck it.

Well I’ll smash the last two posts into something vaguely readable in a wrap-up, and then we’ll finally get a puck drop.

2010 West Predictions

Once again its time for pointless predictions of how an 82 game season involving 30 teams will iron out before even one game it played. Considering last season’s predictions went something like 4 for 8 in the West and 6 for 8 in the East, and I missed just about every Division and Conference finish for each team, I wouldn’t trust this shit any further than I could throw it. And in order to streamline the process and limit the endless bullshit that I could write, I’ll keep it real simple and name those teams in it or out of it, learning from previous mistakes for a change. We’ll kick off the West today, and hit the East sometime in the near future, preferably before Thursday to keep this shit legitimate. That’s what we strive for here at "the Grip," legitimacy.
As the true sucker I am, I’m going with the Sharks to take the points lead in the Western Conference, followed closely by Detroit. I think Vancouver’s a shoe-in to take the Northwest considering what that Division looks like.

So those are your Division winners, and if I had to break down the rest of the top 8 its gonna look like this…
1. San Jose Sharks
2. Detroit Red Wings
3. Vancouver Canucks
4. Chicago Blackhawks
5. Los Angeles Kings
6. Nashville Predators
7. Calgary Flames
8. Colorado Avalanche

Not too confident about the Avs being in there, but the Blues missing the postseason with their half-price jinx they put on the team. That's some bad juju right there. But I could see them or Phoenix battling for that eighth spot, but that was a miracle run for them last year, despite Tippett still a fixture. Dallas is in a pending sale, Minnesota is, well Minnesota, and Anaheim will need to reload for a few years. I like Columbus for last, just to piss some dickhead off, and I’d think Edmonton would improve with the young talent and nowhere to go but up. But you never know.

Mistakes? Well putting San Jose, the perennial regular season champion, back in that spot might be optimistic with the new goaltending situation, but I have a feeling that powerful offense will carry the load, the same way Chicago did last season. The Canucks will earn plenty of points in their Division but they’ll have some rough patches to keep them back a bit. Chicago, despite having a lot of keep personnel still in place, will be hungover with cockiness. The Kings will surge but still have some lessons to learn at the end of the season. Calgary could also be a mistake, but I have to think the last chances of Kipper and Iggy et al. will be the driving force behind that team, not to mention the misery of last season’s miss.

After doing a breakdown of the East, I’ll wrap it up into a neat little package, and make a few more pointless, unfounded predictions just for shits and giggles.